BLUES BREAKERS

So, I wish there was an easier way, but I’m sorry to say, the path to self-fulfilling joy and creativity is riddled with embarrassing confrontations of yourself. Conquer embarrassment by being the one who embraces it while others run from it. 

Sometimes these activities are funny and silly things to do, a way to move your body that releases the burdens of seriousness. Sometimes though, through this play, you can actually make some pretty jarring discoveries about how you’ve been treating yourself or looking at the world. I know that might sound scary, but because you arrive at those conclusions and realizations from a place of play and discovery rather than ridicule and judgment, they become monumentally easier to process. 

Cause here’s the thing I think people are scared to say sometimes– It is hard to be happy. It takes work and intentional effort. I think it’s scary to say because it sounds edgy and probably depressed. But I mean, take a look at the world right now. If you let everything just wash over you without fighting back, you’d be miserable! You have to work for your own happiness, and a lot of what’s out there doesn’t care to help you do that work. You have to find ways to bring fun, laughter, and excitement into your life. It’s a skill, and skills take practice. So practice. We need you. Joy is our next great rebellion. 

I’ve included a difficulty scale. More stars means more difficult, and more difficult means you have to be more committed to your own sense of goofiness and self to perform it meaningfully. I also recommend you keep a notebook or something around while you do any of these, as usually, they are the springboard for a healthy creative session. Lately, I’ve been in the headspace where I need to do these alone, but they can be a lot of fun to do with a friend or two as well. Take a moment to express gratitude for the intimacy of such deep artistic companionship. 

Here are little rituals for the part of us which plays, spins, and sings.

HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION-  Do 20 walkouts (to music of your choice) like you’re a heavyweight boxer about to get in the ring to take on your demons. Your gloves are named some iteration of Joy & Sunshine, or something like that. Ope, just got the odds back from my bookie down in Vegas, you’re the overwhelming favorite. (You don’t actually have to do TWENTY, that number is just there because usually when I need to do this, I don’t want to. So the first 3-5 are just shaking off the rust and loosening up. It won’t take 20 for you to start enjoying yourself, but if it does, that’s okay too. 

Difficulty: ★★★☆☆

Thanks, it’s great to be here!- Interview yourself out loud. If you don’t know how to start, start by asking a question about whatever you’re doing at that moment. Go from there. You tend to end up at questions you’re meant to ask yourself. I like to do this when I’m writing or drawing, that way I can vocalize my process and thoughts to myself. Not only has this helped me understand that creative time, it gets me some valuable reps and keeps my question asking skills sharp. 

Difficulty: ★☆☆☆☆

Lion’s Breath Meditation- Sit on the floor, close your eyes, and center yourself. Imagine you are a powerful lion going to look for grace, peace, joy, and acceptance within yourself. When you’re on the journey you will inevitably run into sadness, anger, anxiety, fear, etc. When you encounter them on your path, take a deeeeeep breath in through your nose. Imagine you’re sucking them up like a vacuum cleaner. At the peak of your breath, exhale out your mouth making whatever sound effects feel natural to release. do a gentle little headshake. you are the lion. expel these negative emotions from your current path. regulate your breath again and continue on. 4-10 reps.

Difficulty: ★★★☆☆

Pool Side Practitioner- Congratulations on your new job! A poolside, aquatic aerobic coach for the elderly. Make a playlist and start instructing them on today’s moves. 

Difficulty: ★★★☆☆

What would a monster say?- Briefly indulge the negative thoughts. Fully and entirely. Every bit of rage, frustration, sadness, anxiety, etc. Start writing it down. You are not you during this exercise, you are the disastrous thoughts within. Don’t attempt to correct them. expel them. Yuck PaaattteeeeewWwW!  become them. after a bit, you snap out of it. you realize how heinous and corrosive those thoughts are. they’re swirling and staining your beautiful genius. now they’re out. you can see and read the absolute vitriol that once was. you are not that monster. you indulged it. saw what it was and also had the emotional POWER AND INTELLIGENCE to pull yourself out of this pattern. Say it without believing it. Usually I’m a proponent for keeping all your work, but this can be destroyed. It’s purpose has been served. Your motion with the universe is smoother without the burden of these thoughts. 

Difficulty: ★★★★☆

LET’S TALK ABOUT BULLYING- Talk to the negative voice in your head like you’re delivering an anti-bullying monologue for a 1994 VHS tape.

Difficulty: ★★★☆☆

Slow Stretching- Hold each of these positions for 2-4 minutes. Focus on your breath and the gentle stretching sensation with each of these. go slowwwwww.

• Forward Fold- Release your arms and upper body.

• Child’s Pose

• Extended Child’s pose

• Downward Dog

• Mountain pose

Difficulty: ★☆☆☆☆

Pretend DJ- I put on my sunglasses, get a glass of juice, wear a funky outfit, and sit at my desk with Spotify pulled up introducing songs like I’m live on the airwaves. “DJ Dreamy Sweets coming to you live on the Virtuoso Connection, spinning you something spectacular and feeling OH-so-Oh-So. Today’s records are brought to you by something to take the edge off. If you’ve got something to sew, let’s watch it grow! Twin vines climb the spine and plant a fauna sauna in your mind. HmmmmHm hear those daffodils sprouting spring bells for the resonation sensation!? DingDong and come along!”

Difficulty: ★★☆☆☆

Western Showdown- Got demons? YeeeeHaw, well get ready to draw cause it’s a showdown at sundown. For me, this turns into….. Mosey up to what’s been giving you trouble lately.

Difficulty: ★★★★☆

Circle Strut- Strange things happen when you walk in a circle. Find a space that’s not so big that you can’t grasp the sensation of roundness, but not so small that you get dizzy. Once you’ve got your [ S T R U T   Z O N E ], set an intention and start walking. Here are a few that I use with this method:

• Intention: Jubilance- Put on music and pretend you’re celebrating with /  leading a village of cartoon animals who deeply admire you. 
  Difficulty: ★☆☆☆☆
  

• Intention: Clarity and communication- I like to get my ~wealthy-middle-aged-woman~ strut on here. I imagine I’m gossiping up an absolute tea party with Donna from next door. Here’s the kicker though, the gossip? It’s my own, unfiltered, monologue. Maybe it’s serious mental/emotional preoccupations that you could now comprehend through playing this ridiculous character, maybe it’s silly fictional stream-of-conscious storytelling, whatever!  but for some reason I find pretending to be a middle aged woman who pumps her arms thoroughly as she walks to be a fun way to get my communication flow going.
  Difficulty: ★★☆☆☆
  

• Intention: Alignment. It’s said that there are 7 body parts people tend to “lead” with when they walk. Take a few laps focusing on leading with each of these. 

  • head

  • shoulders

  • chest

  • stomach

  • pelvis 

  • knees

  • feet

Start by doing it in SILENCE. (It’s hard and feels weird) but it gives you a really good baseline of how to lead with each of these. AFTER you do that, try it with music! Listen to some of your favorite songs and walk in your circle, lead with whatever feels natural for that tune!

Difficulty: ★★★★☆

Say a Little Booyah- you’ve recently been inaugurated as the president of booyah distribution! Some things in this crazy world have gone days, months, YEARS (!!) without anyone saying booyah to them. What a joyless tragedy. Let’s right these wrongs with a list of booyahs.

• booyah for rivers

• booyahs to the birds 

Difficulty: ★☆☆☆☆

Surf Lessons- Pretend surf while listening to Miserlou by Dick Dale and His Del-Tones. 2 minutes and 16 seconds all out.

Difficulty: ★★★★★

3-Minute Belly Rub-  Pretty self explanatory. I like doing this laying on the floor, rather than laying in bed, but do whatever you’re comfortable with. I’d say keep your eyes closed too. Feel your brain and your body connect. Thank that which is unseen.

Difficulty: ★☆☆☆☆

Something Primal- Go to the Argentinian butcher on Southport, buy 1-3 lbs. of carne asada, cook it up medium-rare while smoking a joint, and eat it in the nude with your bare hands. Squatting encouraged.

Difficulty: ★★☆☆☆